Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Lucydog

About ten years ago, my husband and I drove pass the bank on Rogers Ave across from Wal-Mart. What did we see? A couple giving away dogs. They were the cutest little lab puppies you have ever seen. Matt and I had never had a dog as a couple, up until this point we had lived in an apartment. Just a few months before we got Lucydog, we had rented a house in Spiro. Well, that day would be the day that Matt and I got our first dog, as a married couple. We had only been married two years, and had just found out that we were expecting our first child.
We spoiled our dog rotten. If you have never had a lab puppy, they are very frisky little dogs. Lucydog dug many holes in the back yard, and chewed the trim on our rent house. But we never had to potty train her, she knew what to do from day one.
It was the funniest thing, one night it was storming outside. Lucydog has always been terrified of storms. I remember her standing at the front glass door, just waiting for the weather to ease up so she could go outside and pee. The weather did not ease up any time soon, and poor little Lucy could not stand it anymore. We opened the door and she ran out to the middle of the yard as fast as she could, she did her business and ran back in.
She has been a part of everything in our life. She has always been so good with our kids. They love her so much. But she is Daddy's baby. She would sit with him in his building when he worked in his shop, she knew who her master was. We have tons of memory's of our precious Lucydog. Abby used to ride on her back like a horse, when she barely able to walk. I can't tell you how many times our dog jumped into our kids swimming pool. She didn't like the rain, but she loved the swimming pool. One of her favorite things in the summer, my kids feeding her popsicles.
She has loved us, protected us, jumped on us, and played catch with us. But today we found out, her time with us is almost over. Our beloved Lucydog has cancer, and heart worms. She is getting tired, and we are living out Marley and Me in real life.
We picked the kids up from my moms, and we talked to them as we drove down the road. We explained that Lucydog was really sick and that there was nothing else we could do for her. we told them it was our job to just love on her and give her the best possible few days left that we could. My poor little Abby immediately burst into tears, in her own dramatic, yet very heartfelt way. She sometimes came home from school, went straight into Lucydogs pen and played with her. Zach had his face in between his knees, trying to be a tough little man, and not wanting us to see. He raised he little face and tears were rolling down his little face. Needless to say, there wasn't a dry eye in the truck. Their poor little hurts broke.
We went to Sonic, Lucydog, with us, and we even ordered a meal for Lucydog. The kids helped to pick out what she would eat. That really helped cheer them up. They thought it was funny that Lucydog was going to have Sonic food with us. They have hovered around her all evening, brushing her, hugging her, and praying for their dog. After all, they have had her their entire life.
Keep us in your prayers.

Monday, April 27, 2009

What have you given to Jesus?

What have you given to Jesus lately? Every evening we sit down with our kids at dinner and have devotion time and prayer. All of that is great, but devotion and prayer is not enough. What kind of life example's have you been to your kids, your friends, your spouse, or your family?
We have been asked to help to take care of Mrs Sue upon occasion. I am not patting myself on the back, by any means. One night we had left her house, and Matt turned to the kids, and said, "Do you know that we helped Jesus tonight?" The kids looked at him kind of funny, and said, "what do you mean?" That night devotion time happened on the way home. We explained to our kids why we help people and how the bible says that if you give someone a glass of water, it is like you give it to Jesus. So whenever we help anyone, it is as if we helped Jesus. It became real to me that night. Of course we have devotion time, but what am I doing to show my kids what it means to be Jesus to someone else. How often am I willing to give to Jesus, even when it's not convenient for me.
I am blessed to be a part of a church, who gives to Jesus daily. Just over the last few weeks alone, people have helped us with our vehicle, I sent out an email about needing to purchase a lawn mower, and within 24 hours, someone had brought a lawn mower to our house to borrow, someone else was helping us look for a lawn mower, and yet another person called to say we could borrow their mower until we bought one. Last week God brought to us a girl in need.
Once again I sent out an email about this girl in need of a job, and with a day, I had received 4 emails of possible job leads, one email just offering to be her friend and willing to hang out with her, and the Care Ministry provided her with some money to help her until she could find a job.
I can't say it enough, that if you are not in a fuel cell, get into one. It is not just a study time, it is time to get close to your church family. Our Fuel Cell is there for each other, we truly love and care for each other, in a way that I have never experienced before. If you need a room painted, your family is there, if you need prayer and support, your fuel cell family is there, if you need a babysitter, your fuel cell family is there. I can't tell you how much we lean upon each other, and genuinely care for one another. Once again, by example, we show the love of Christ to each other daily.
Honestly, I could go on and on, but I think you get my point. I want my kids to not only learn by devotion time, but to learn by example. Our church is full of examples of what it means to give to Jesus daily. I could name names, but I know these people well enough to know, they do not do things for recognition, they do it because of their love for Christ. I love my church, because my church loves Jesus.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Here comes the bride.........

October 8, 1988 a little girl was born. She was beautiful, and perfect in every way. She had beautiful brown hair, and tiny little fingers. If I remember correctly, she had a birth mark on the back her neck. A birth mark that my family claims as the "Erwin" mark. Many of our family members have the same birth mark on the back of their head just around the neck line. She was the first of six niece's and nephew's on my side of the family.
I was just a child myself when she was born. I was only 15 years old. I did not miss one part of the pregnancy. I was able to go to doctor's visits with her mom. In some small way, I was a part of that baby growing inside of her belly, at least as much as I could be. I was so excited. I remember the day she was born. We waited impatiently in the waiting room. My brother, who was only 18 at the time, I had never seen him so nervous. He was this skinny little kid, and I remember as he pulled open the doors to the maternity ward, he nearly passed out. Before we knew, this beautiful baby was born.
Her mom ended up having to stay in the hospital for 3 weeks. She had a high fever that would not break, and the doctor's could not figure out what was wrong. My dad loved her like a daughter, and he worried about her. So much, that I remember his little chat with the doctor's in the hallway, that he wanted to know what was wrong with her and they already wasted too much time figuring it out. By the time Sandy came home, she was back down to her normal size, as if she had never been pregnant.
My niece lived with us for a few short months. My heart became deeply attached to that precious little girl. More so than I ever could have imagined. I helped take care of her when Sandy was working, I helped her with over night feedings. I became very attached to this precious little baby.
I wish I could share with you everything I know about her life, but for me, that is all of the life I was blessed to know. Even though I may not have seen her first steps, or heard about her first day of school, I can't even tell you about her 16th birthday. But I remembered her everyday of my life. I prayed for her daily, and the love I have her lies deep within my heart. The circumstances that prevented me from knowing her, were not ones that a 15 year old girl could change. But no circumstance on earth, could change the love I have her. Nothing could ever stop me from praying for her, caring for her, and hoping that one day she will want to know this person that loves her so much.
Tonight, that baby girl became a woman. A woman that is now wife. Today was her wedding day. I can't believe that 20 years have gone by, and all I can share with you is her birth story. I had hoped to see her in her beautiful dress. This is her special day. I prayed for her today, I prayed that this day was everything she had ever dreamed of. I prayed that God has given her man that will love her, and cherish her, and make her feel as though she is the most important and most beautiful woman on the face of the earth. I may not have been there, but I thought of her all day today.
I opened up my facebook, and someone had posted a picture of her from tonight. She looked amazing. Her dress was strapless, simple, yet elegant. Her hair was beautiful, it looked as though she had a little curl on the sides. A tear began to roll down my face. I hate everyday that I miss another day of her life. As one tear fell, several more began to follow. I'm so happy for her. I wish she could know the love I have for her in my heart. I pray that she is blessed with a wonderful life. I will never give up. As my daughter has taught me this week, it just takes a little faith and little prayer. I will never give up on one day being a part of her very special life.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

My Mini Twin

Well, my daughter broke her arm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. It's one of those things that just seems to happen. Well, what would you think if I told you how much my daughter and I are truly alike. We were both born breach, at the age of 2 we both busted our heads open on the corner of a table and had to get stitches, we both have beautiful matching scars on our foreheads, and now the broken wrist. I was five and she is now six, both of us with a broken left wrist. We have laughed about this, and my daughter and son are very amused by the story. Just remember, our kids walk in our shoes more than we will ever know. My son is nine, never had a stitch, or a broken bone. :) I'm thinking that he will follow in his daddy's shoes. At least he has my artistic ability. But he likes the same kind of things his daddy likes, he is almost a mirror image of his daddy. He is very particular about how he arranges the clothes in his dresser, the kind of shoes he wears, and takes interest in the same things his daddy does. It amazes me, that even without trying, our kids take on our characteristics and even some of our habits. So be careful what you do and what you say, because little eye's are always watching.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

I Love My Church

A little over two years ago, I found myself hurt by church. I didn't want to go to church, I didn't want to pray or read my bible. Questions were encamped in my brain, is this what church is really suppose to be like? Should anyone ever feel not accepted at any church? I wore the right clothes, I rarely missed a service, I was actively involved in the church, I paid my tithes. Why did I feel so left out, and so disconnected from what was suppose to be God's people.
My friend once told me that her mom said to her, if you can't live close to family, find a good church where you live and they will be your family. I did not feel this way. I did not feel as though I was surrounded by family. When I think of family, I think of people that are going to love you no matter what. People that are there to help pick you up when you are down. People that can be your strength when you are weak. People that want to share life with you, laugh with you, cry with you, and pray with you.
I am reminded every March 31st, on my husbands birthday, of this low point in our life. No, not because it's my husbands birthday, but because it is also the same day that Shane and Mary's son passed away. It's been three years now, since little Nate passed away. I would love to say that I can tell you all of these wonderful stories about Nate, but truth is I had only met Nate once or twice. I do not think it is a coincidence that this happened on Matt's birthday, because it always stands as a reminder of where we were headed and where God has brought us to today.
You may be wondering what does Nate have to do with this story. As Shane and Mary know I can make a long story out of this, but I will try to give you the short version. Shane coached our son's t-ball team. We did not know Shane, honestly we did not know at first that he was a pastor. We knew he was a Christ follower, but was not your ordinary Pocola, OK pastor in a suit and tie. He was a normal Dad involved in his kid's lives. During the first weeks of t-ball practice, Nate got sick. In a very short period of time Nate was gone. Zach and Sammy were in class together, we offered to help get him to t-ball games and we began to watch a couple in the days and months to come, cope with the loss of their son. Matt and I were attending church, and had been attending the same church since the day we got married.
One reason we had never changed churches, we just didn't know of a place we really wanted to go to. Watching Shane and Mary over the course of the year after their sons loss, sparked something inside of me. I told my husband, I need to take our kids some where, so I'm going to take them to FBC on Sunday. The kids had attended VBS there and really liked it, so I thought we should try it. I came home energized, and constantly talking about the service and the people. Many of which are still with us at Fuel. They made me feel welcome from day one, and I knew that is where God wanted me to be. However, I am not the head of our home, luckily my spark, sparked something in my husband and together we went. I remember one Sunday Morning, we sat in service after a few short weeks, and my husband passed me a note that said, I am as sure that this is where we are suppose to be as I was sure about marrying you. We joined the church that day, and Mary hugged me afterwards and said, " I knew today was the day."
Every March 31st, I am reminded of the purpose of that little boys life. Every March 31st, I am reminded that God has placed us where we are suppose to be. We love our church. I have never experienced church in quite this way. People growing together in Fuel Cells, actually helping people through life, no matter what they have done or where they come from. This church is more my family, than anyone has ever been in my life. It is the love of Christ that flows through the people, that lifted me up when I was down.
God confirmed to us one night in Shane and Mary's living room, that we were to serve together with them, and that is what we are here to do. God once again reminded me, that we are here to serve and be whatever we need to be for our pastor's and for our church family. I love my church, and the love they show to me and my family daily.

Zach and Abby's Baptism